Monday, December 27, 2010

Extreme Make Over Home Edition

Hello everyone happy belated christmas and a wonderful new year in advance. Saying welcome to our new members: Steve Hawley, Lloyd 1948 & Covnitkepr1...Thank you for becoming a part of secretlilies...

Now back to the topic of the day.. Extreme Make Over Home Edition
I spent the whole of christmas and the better part of boxing day watching this show on BBC lifestyle channel. They had the special edition so they showed a lot of the works they had done...Now for those of you who don't know what this show is about...Its a reality television series hosted by Ty Pennington, where they renovate homes for the less fortunate families who have been affected by one disaster, illness or the other....

I spent my christmas like I said, tucked beside my hubby, crying, laughing and thanking God for the good, life changing gifts Ty and his group gave numerous families, and believe me it was the most gratifying thing to do.... Some of them got (i.e. in addition to the renovation of their houses) new cars, trucks, scholarship for their children university/college tuition, family vacations abroad, health care, mortgage paid, and especially beautifully furnished, designed homes fit for kings and queens....

Lesson learnt:

there is one thing to make money but if you ask me it's so gratifying if you can use your money to make a difference around you.... Meeting people at the points of their needs should be our goals as we all cross over into the new year....

I love Ty Pennington not for anything but for the fact that he is associated with a program that gives hope to the hopeless....

If I am asked which celebrity will I like to meet, without hesitation I will say Ty Pennington and his crew for they will be remembered for the good they have brought into the homes of families who thought all hope was lost......

Once again I wish you merry christmas and a happy new year.

Notez Bien:

"the hour has come to write down our goals and what we want to achieve in the new year. I urge you to think it through thoroughly before you write it down...
For me my number one goal is to touch the lives of people around me........ What about you?

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

A Story Worth Sharing

Somebody put this on facebook and I thought I should share this with you...In her own words...
Alabi Anastasia:

My boss told us today how his friend (though a tough choice) gave a widow all the money he had (#16,000 i.e. $105 for school fees and feeding, the widow cried and thanked him. He felt good inside but scared and broke but he trusted God. That same evening a friend visited him and gave him a million naira cheque (i.e. $6700) just 2 "HOLD BODY".......

When I read this I screamed..whoa....Really how can God be this miraculous. Will it have been easy for me to do what this man did? Would I have been able to trust God wholeheartedly? Would I have given the widow or would I have held on to the 16k, especially during this christmas period.....

This is the season of giving, no matter how little make sure you give to touch someone's heart...

Notez Bien: " Please help me I am stuck....What christmas present can I buy for my mother in law...something inexpensive and lovely....Please help....

Saturday, December 18, 2010


Info from Copyblogger by Julien Smith

DONALD TRUMP's Top 3 Tips For Dominating Your Niche.....

We know his name. We know his brand. We even know his hair. But do we know how he does it?
If Donald Trump has created a building in your city, you know it. You not only know he has one but you know exactly where it is. Maybe you even know how much it cost. You might even know about buildings he's developed in other cities. Are there any other real estate developers you can say that about? Why do we know so much about The Donald?

This happened to me when I was in Chicago last year. I looked out the window and BAM...there he is again. Trump International Hotel Chicago. So what are the methods that The Donald uses, the stuff that can help us find a larger audience, write a better blog, build a better business? turns out there're simple, effective, and unforgettable.

Trump Tip #1: Be everywhere
Are you posting only on your website? Are you only writing but not doing videos? Are your ads appearing only where everyone else's (including your competitors) are? Then you are missing out on a lot of what you can do to build audience, visibility and profile. People need to see your face. They need to feel your energy. They need to see your hair everywhere you go. If you are only giving your audience a part of who you are, and only in a certain location, that's like being a guru on the top of a mountain in Bhutan. If no one can find you, you're not likely to get a lot of disciples. how about, instead, you participate everywhere you are allowed to? You use every medium to which you' re allowed access?

Trump Tip #2: Don't pay cash
Donald may be rich but do you really think he pays cash-weather to develop real estate or to access new audiences? Most people misunderstand how business works and think that, in many cases, they're unable to do something that is within their reach.
When trump writes a book with Robert Kiyosaki of do you think it is because they were like "High five! lets write a book together, just for kicks!"

Uh, no.

Top level players do project like these to get access to each other's audiences. Everything is strategic. Everything is one for leverage. And leverage is just another word for" I didn't pay cash to play".
Same thing when he does Trump University and The Apprentice. All of these are audience plays. Trump doesn't pay cash, ever. he trades chips with people who can benefit him.
You can work the same angles. Don't try to get your audience or your customers by buying them. Instead, play the game. Use chips. Think strategically on how you can use leverage to gain access to something you otherwise couldn't.

Trump Tip# 3: Exceed Expectations

When I walked into the Trump International Beach Resort in Miami, I was skeptical. What I believed I'd see and what I actually experienced where vastly different. I was shocked by how polite the staff were. I was stunned by the fact that I actually wanted to spend time there. But most of all I was shocked by the smell.

Yes, the smell

The air in the Trump International had a light, fragrant, airy perfume. It was amazing. Can you shock people? Not with rudeness or vulgarity (necessarily), but with your over-the-top-attitude, your expertise, your commitment to doing something great, or your extravagance? You may not have the ability (or desire) to shock with Trump-like excess. But you can also shock with your appreciation for the little things- the details.

Be Like The Donald?
You may not take the Donald seriously. The hair does make it difficult. Or you may think you could never translate what he's done to your own business. It certainly isn't easy.

But it does have a formula and this is it:

You have to try..

I hope you learn a lot from this article as I have learnt...
Happy Weekend..

Friday, December 17, 2010

Shopping Tips

Hello everyone...saying welcome to my good friend Chile, thank you for becoming a member of the secretlilie's family.

I know everyone is saying thank God is friday, the weekend is soooo near and it's going to be a lovely one, especially for me...

Well I will like to leave some shopping tips for people who stay in Lagos.... cheap, affordable tips...

For the people who stay on the Island, we know that drinking water is like a luxury cos of the terrain. We either have to buy pure water, bottle water or the Cway water and the dispenser. This can be additional cost, and we don't need it this christmas period...I am sure you know what I mean.

Anyways I went to shoprite, in the Palms, lekki, for some quick shopping and I decided to go to the water section...lo and behold I saw La voltic bottle water for #57 instead of #100... You can imagine my joy...I quickly packed as many as I could for who knows...So please if you are going that way hurry up to the water stand and pick up la voltic..

I just heard another new departmental store has opened in lekki. I hear it is awesome and affordable. It is called Ebano.... What I really love about this store is that it is an indigenous departmental store. If it's as cheap as they say, I will be a patriotic Nigerian and stick to them...

Lastly before I leave my friend just started her water business and it is good...look out for the swagga water..It is really pure....

Men!!!!!! I must say that Nigerians are really making things happen, and fantastic if you ask me...

Like I said it's friday and we can't all wait for the weekend to begin... Enjoy your weekend and do something gratifying to your soul...loll.....

Take care of yourself and Ciao....

Thursday, December 16, 2010


A friend sent this to me and I will like to share it with you:

Interesting quote from the movie "why did I get married?" In most cases especially in relationships, you will only get 80% of what you need and you will hardly get the other 20% that you WANT in your relationship.

There is always another person (man or woman) that you will meet that will offer you the other 20% which is lacking your relationship that you WANT. And believe me, 20% looks really good when you are not getting it at all in your current relationship. But the problem is that you will always be tempted to leave that good 80% that you know you have, thinking you will get something better with the other 20% that you WANT. But as reality has proven, in most cases you will end up having the 20% that you WANT and losing the 80% that you already NEED and that you already had.

Be careful in deciding what you WANT and NEED in your life. Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have. "Wow this girl in my office is a real looker. But it's not her Wynona Rider that got to me. I'm crazy about her cos she is also understanding, intelligent, tender-so many things that my spouse is not".

Somewhere along the way you will find a woman or man who will be more charming or sensitive. More alluring. More thoughtful. Richer. Have greater sex appeal. And you will find a man or a woman who will need you and pursue you and go loco of you more than your spouse every did.

Because no wife or husband is perfect. Because a spouse will only give 80% of what you are looking for. So adultery takes place when the wife or the husband is looking for the other 20%.

Let's say your wife is melancholic (sad) by nature.
You may find yourself drawn to the pretty clerk who has a cherry laugh no matter what she says: "I broke my arm yesterday..hahahahaha...."

Or because your wife is a homebody in slippers and pajamas smelling of garlic and fish oil you may fall for a fresh smelling sales representative that visits your office in a sharp black blazer, high heels and a red pencil cut skirt.
Or because your husband is the quiet type, your heart may skip a beat when you meet an old college flame who has the makings of a talk show host.

But wait that's only 20% of what you don't have. Don't throw away 80% that you already have! That's not all. Add to your spouse 80% the 100% that represents all the years you have been with each other. The storms you have weathered together. The unforgettable moments of sadness and joy as a couple. The many adjustments you have made to love each other. The wealth of memories that you have accumulated as lovers.

Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have. But faithfulness happens when you start thanking God for what you already have. But I'm not just talking about marriage.
I'm talking about life,
about your jobs.
about your friends.
about your children.
about your lifestyle.

Are you like the economy airline passenger that perennially peeks through the door of the first class cabin, obsessed with what he is missing? they've got more leg room! Oh my their food is served in porcelain! Whoa their seats recline at an 80% angle and they've got personal videos!

I guarantee you'll be miserable for the entire trip! Don't live your life for that, forget about what the world says is first class. Do you know that there are many first class passengers who are miserable in first class because they are not riding in a private Lear jet?

The main message::::: If you start appreciating what you have right now, wherever you are you are first class 20/80 or 80/20. You determine your lot in life. Enjoy what you have cos you are blessed. Whatsoever you do in life think of the future benefit than the immediate satisfaction could be momentary but benefits is eternal.


Wednesday, December 8, 2010

True Friendship

Hello everyone and what's up?
Saying welcome to Melissa, P.E.T. Project and thank you Myne Whitman for your comments.

Recommended book: " A heart To Mend", by Myne Whitman. Will have a review of the book by next week. I just bought my copy yesterday and I am so looking forward to reading it.

Now back to the topic of today: True Friendship...

There are some friends that cross your path which you never expect, the bond you build with them usually very close and tight... I think friendship formed this way, is ordained by God..

I am saying thank you to my new friend who is also a blogger (you can check out her blog @ Thank you for being a friend.

As I talk about friendship, I remember a dear friend of mine, in fact I often said she was my best friend, mon meilleur ami... The day I heard that she was involved in an accident I cried.
That day I thought to myself: so I will never see her again.
This friend was always there for me. We were seat mates in secondary school, we both had our futures planned together. She was a shoulder to cry on and I was shoulder to lean on. We had times where we laughed, cried, played, argued and just stayed friends....

I know this may sound weird, for I had a dream and I saw her in the dream. I asked her if she was in heaven and she said yes she was, immediately an overwhelming peace filled my heart.

It sounds very funny and I am a little bit embarrassed saying it, but I just feel it is time.

I feel maybe there is someone out there who has lost someone dear. It may not be a friend, maybe a mother or a father or a brother, or a sister, I know how you feel. For this friend of mine was like a sister to me. She was my sister from another mother.

Oh Fubby as we called her, I wish you are still here with me. It's been two years now and I have never said anything about this, I have bottled it up for so long, but I feel it is time to let it go.
I feel it is time to let the world know how it hurts to loose a friend and a sister.

I believe in that dream and I know that you are in heaven.

Adieu my friend
Adieu fubby
Adieu Tata
Until we meet again

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Welcome To Lagos

Hello everybody:
saying thank you once again for your nice comments and advices, I feel better. Now I am ready to conquer the world, by His grace.
Today my gist is about this young Najia dude oh, who they call the Scavenger (Eric Oboh)... The young dude who was featured on the BBC documentary entitled " Welcome to Lagos"...which was aired on BBC2 in the United Kingdom (UK), on April 15.

Much as I do not like the way CNN and BBC often depict Africa, Nigeria as a poverty stricken place, where nothing good can be found and poverty as our watch word.. I learnt something from this documentary...
This dude the Scavenger who was born 1 December, 1980 in Ajekunle Lagos, Nigeria was featured in the documentary, like I said earlier a Scavenger who works and lives in a dumpsite, on the outskirts of Lagos, Nigeria.

Occupation: he collects recyclable materials and sells them. Whatever he gets from the sale he saves them. He uses it to buy studio time in order to produce a music album.

Since this documentary, he has become very famous. A lot of sites have been set up to help promote his music. So please check his facebook page, download his song from itunes.

He has also featured in articles about "Welcome To Lagos" in the Observer, The Independent & the London Metro...

I also heard this gist that he was in London recently singing for a crowd of about 5ooo......hmmm what do you think?

For me his story makes me realize that really my hubby was right. There are people out there who have worse problems than you have, and they still have hope. I know I don't have to live in the dumpsite......

Then again I am so impressed with this Scavenger's determination.

I now know for certain that anything can be achieved, how?...In different ways...But when goals are set and it is attacked judiciously, it will be achieved.

Conclusion: Nobody has an excuse not to succeed in this life

P.S: links to the Scavenger...BBC2 documentary...

Note: Please Nigeria is not all about crime, corruption, poverty, slums..etc...Nigeria has its good side too.....and besides every country has its good and bad......

It is time for us Nigerians, Africans world wide to tell our own stories...


Monday, December 6, 2010

Not Happy

Hmm what can I say folks, today I am sad. I am so sad and angry at the same time.
Writing has become a part of me that most at times when I feel this way, the only way I can let it out is by pouring my feelings out in any form of writing.

Today again like some days I asked God why? I felt so bad...I have been crying ever since...

My hubby always says when you think your situation is the worst you have only to look around you, you will see that there are millions of people who are in deeper shit than you are. (Please pardon my english, for I am sad and angry)..

Yes I know that there are people in worse situation than me, but will that help me. What consolation is that.

People only give you advise and tell you to have patience, hold on, your time will come, it is well blah blah blah blah...Sometimes I feel they talk like this because they don't know how it feels. Can they even trust themselves if they are in my situation? What will they do, I ask myself.

In fact today I was just snapping at everybody that came close to me. I am sure the cashier in the local store near my house must have thought me a viper for I snapped at her to be fast with my balance. Her smiling face and slow attitude got on my nerves..
Why should she smile? What was so good about the day?
I bought myself 3 sticks of ice cream and I took every thing. I am suppose to be watching my sugar intake, strictly doctors orders, but who really cares : doctors orders my foot...

I have snapped, cursed, begged and cried... but then I can choose..

I can choose to wallow in self pity or I can choose to stand up and conquer the world. For every time I read a success story, it usually comes with challenges, problems, obstacles that almost brought defeat at their door, but they still held on....

I have no where to go to, I just have to hold on.... I believe in God and I know he can do it, but men,,,, I must say that it isn't easy at all.

Some days I am happy...I wake up and I feel I can conquer the world. Some days I wake up and I am sad, weighed by all the challenges I have to face in this life.

I ask: when will this phase pass me by?
When will I see all the goods things in life...

Ahh I must confess that it isn't easy and sometimes I feel I can't do it anymore.
But I will still believe for I know that I will see the light at the end of the tunnel, some day. When it will come I do not know, but I pray that is doesn't tarry for long.

God help me and just keep me before I run mad..loll... I know that YOU will not let me and YOU ARE always going to be there for me.
What I am suppose to learn, please teach me, so that I can learn, for I can't wait for this phase to pass...

Friday, December 3, 2010

Hangover From Social Network

Hello guys...

Still on my journey to be the next best name and I have been thinking, in fact I couldn't sleep. When I finally slept I dreamt about social network...LOL. Oh please God help head is still spinning and it will not stop until something powerful comes in...loll....

Well let me give you a little hint..I have started my third novel and I think this is very dear to me, for I can already feel my character's pain. Her name is Eva and she is an adorable young woman, trying to rise above her situation.
Will she do it?
Yes she will for I think and strongly believe that every man/woman fighting to change his/her situation eventually achieves their goal.

I hope you love my character like I do for I really love her. She has become a part of me and my very good friend.

So off again to think of something great...Oh boy before I forget: LET'S welcome the new member in the good friend Bimbo, thank you for becoming a member of the family.

Wendal I love your comments, nice one and good info about the internet guy... See you later alligator.....

Note: someone just told me that the guy who invented the internet didn't get a patent or something like that? I really need to do a research about him and I will get back to you guys on this gist....

P.S. please patent your ideas, business plans, research, inventions, anything... for one never knows where the money or breakthrough will come from.

Have a lovely weekend, for I will.


Thursday, December 2, 2010

Social Network

Hi everyone, I need to write this cos my head is on fire. I just saw this film Social Network, the story about how facebook started and how it became famous and I am like......are you kidding me, really.....what does Mark Elliot Zuckerberg have in his brain, that I do not have. How come he became billionaire, accidentally or unaccidentally, it doesn't matter now....loll..... because from what I saw this guy didn't even know what he was dealing with... Oh my God... Please someone help me before I loose it...loll....

I need to make money and I need to make it genuinely. I don't want the money our politicians and so called fathers of this nation have stolen, I want real genuine money. I want people to know me for generating wealth through the right source and helping people around me and communities.

Really the way I feel right now, is like I shouldn't sleep at all. In fact the more I sleep the more I waste time... Abi what do you think?

Men...... I know this thing for sure God made all men equally and has deposited in each of us talents, no matter the race or the color. So we just have to fish them out and use it, it doesn't matter what country you come from or what's your nationality. I know one thing: hard work, brings reward. It may take years but one day we will all reap what we sow..

For now I bid you farewell for I am going into my covers to think of my ideas, ideas that will bring me billions of dollars and make me famous...loll...

P.S: take care and please always think positively for anyone can be the next Mark Elliot Zuckerberg or even better.....


Saturday, November 27, 2010


Hello guys and whats up? I hope we are all chilling and relaxing this weekend, cos I am. Before I say ciao this week, I will like to say a big HELLO to our new members Chinny and sue's corrner.

All My followers: thank you for being supportive, with your comments and suggestions..

Now back to the topic of the day " Family"......yesterday I went to Covenant University in Otta for my little cousin's matriculation, it was a blast. As we sat down eating, gisting, taking pictures and laughing, I thought to myself " having a strong, close, loving, dependable family is one of the best things in the world. Secondly the joy in my cousin's face when he saw his family was indescribable. The feeling is inexpressable and not even money can replace that feeling....

Over the years I have learnt that a strong family is the bedrock of the society, and this is very true. Children brought up in stable, loving, dependable families grow up to be confident, ever ready to conquer any obstacle in their way.

Despite the extensive reports about the importance of family, a lot horrible things have been attributed to the family unit, like: " Brothers against brothers, sisters killing mothers, fathers abusing daughters...etc......

For me: " I will give anything to bring that feeling to the lives of my love ones, or anybody that comes my way.. What about you?

Notez bien:

I know that everything successful must have taken a lot of extra effort to get it that way. If we want a stable and fantastic family, we should start now to work at it. Sacrifice that extra time and pay your brother or his family. Give your sister the beautiful dress she has always wanted. Call even if it's just to say Hi or send a text message......

"These are the little things that mean the most in life"....

Take care and have a fantastic weekend.


Thursday, November 25, 2010

What Will You Do?

Hello everyone, I was listening to Oprah a few days back and she interviewed the son of Jim Jones and the sister of John Wayne Gacy and I thought to myself what would I have done if I was in their position?
Who are they?
A brief History:

Jim Jones was the leader of the Peoples Temple. The People's Temple was a religious sect, members about 80% were african americans. In November 18, 1978, Jim Jones was responsible for the death of 900 people. They were all poisoned to death. His son, Jim Jones Jr, who was the first African American boy to be adopted by caucasian parents, was saved because he was away playing basketball.

John Wayne Gacy also known as the killer clown, raped and killed 33 teenage boys and young men between 1972 and 1978...

My question?: How did the siblings, parents, relations feel about their own blood? John sister said that for a very long time she didn't tell anybody what her last name was. She said that when she first heard about what her brother (John Wayne Gacy) had done, she couldn't believe it. Her brother didn't show any sign of it. She said that he had always been a loving uncle to her children.

They both said that they had learnt to forgive them, but that it wasn't easy.
My question:
When society found out, how were the treated? For these 2 men had committed gruesome acts that made American history, acts that the world will never forget.

But they said that they finally forgave them. Like I said a while back this forgiving thing isn't easy but it is the best it is the best. If I try to put myself in their shoes, which I don't want to do, will I ever have been able to forgive them for what they did?
For the shame the brought to our family?
For the pain of knowing that they will always be remembered for the terrible havoc they caused the world.

I ask the question again what will you do if you where in their position?

Monday, November 22, 2010

A little Something to Share

A friend of mine sent me this message and asked that I share it will everybody, of which I promised him I would.....I hope you enjoy reading it:

"A blind boy sat on the steps of a building with a hat by is feet. He held up a sign which said: "I am blind please help". There were only a few coins in the hat. A man was walking by, took a few coins from his pocket and dropped them into the hat. He then took the sign, turned it around, and wrote some words. He put the sign back so that everyone who walked by would see the new word. Soon the hat began to fill up. A lot more people where giving money to the blind boy. That afternoon the man who had changed the signs came to see how things were. The boy recognized his footsteps and asked, "were you the one who changed my sign this morning? What did you write?" The man said, "I only wrote the truth. I said what you said but in a different way. "I wrote: "Today is a beautiful day but I cannot see it". Both signs told the people that the boy was blind. The second sign told people that they were so lucky that they were not blind. Should we be surprised that the second sign was more effective?

Moral of the story: "Be thankful for what you have...Be creative. Be innovative. Think differently and positively. When life gives you a 100 reasons to cry, show life that you have 1000 reasons to smile. Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear. The most beautiful thing is to see a person smiling.....And even more beautiful is knowing that you are the reason behind it!!!

Notez Bien: " I hope after reading this it touched you like it touched me. Everyone has just a life time on earth, make it worth a life time by making someone laugh.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Another Sunday

Hey everyone, sorry i have been out for a while. been a bit busy.
first I want to say congrats to my very good friend Ehimen.......
Congrats your wedding was wonderful.
Secondly I will like to say welcome to our latest member.....Thank you for being a follower.

Now how can I start...This weekend was a very busy one, so busy that I need like a week's rest..loll.
But the good thing was that I had fun. saw some old friends I hadn't seen in a long time. My parents were so happy to see me and once again, I was being treated like a baby..loll.

The new week has come lessons learnt:" I have learnt that opportunities are out there, you just have to tap into it and please don't let it pass you by.
One thing I don't want to ever happen to me, is to look back at my life and heave a deep sigh sigh of regret. must make a mark in this life and die a fulfilled woman.
Take care of yourself and will see everybody later.


Sunday, November 7, 2010

Another Sunday

Hi guys today church was fantastic. I learnt to love God with all my heart. lol I am not saying that I have immediately acquired the virtue but I am practicing it and hey I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me"....
A new week has started, today is my parents 29th wedding anniversary and I am like whoa!!!!! time waits for no man, when did they marry, have kids and now 29 years...whoa..... It just got me thinking my birthday will be in 3 days, on wednesday. HMMM!!!! My birthday is usually a day I look back at my life and say to myself what have you done with yourself.... What goals have you achieved.... A lot just goes through my mind but I know that I will make it and I am strong not weak.
This week my goals are: I will be the best wife to my husband. I am working at making my marriage work for the better...Hey don't get me wrong, I love my marriage but I want it to be better, always get better not go dry....loll..if you know what I mean...
2. I will be good to people, avoid conflicts and try to give alms to the poor.
3. Go out of my way to help someone in need.
so help me God.

P.s: " I hope this week you have goals, like mine or similar and will work towards achieving it...
shhhhh don't tell anybody I am going to shop for my birthday....Whoa go spend the money girl....
Chat later...

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Advice To A Dear Friend

Hi people!!!! Today will like to say a big welcome to UgoDre Obi Chukwu and Mbabazi of Uganda. Welcome to the secretlilies family and I am so happy that you have become one of us. I love your blog Mbabazi and I am so excited, maybe because you are a follower all the way from Uganda..loll. This is an example of the biens of transformative technology.
Thank you once again and to the followers of secretlilies, thank you for sticking with me.

Also before I forget: a special thank you to my hubby for taking out time to read my blog, even though you still haven't become a follower (loll), I am pleased.
I love you.

Now the gist for today.... something happened between a close friend of mine and I. Something hat caused a dispute. Will I say I was at fault? No I wasn't for if you ask me she was.

For something so little she took it to the extreme and when I say to the extreme I mean to the extreme. For instance because of this little episode she has concluded that I don't love her. How can she when all I do is try to make her do the right thing... I know you will I God? But HEY what kind of friend am I who never speaks the truth?

Why do we flare up? is it because we are genuinely angry or is it because we are actually angry at our selves?
Why do we always misunderstand what the next person says?
Why is it that when the HUBBY wants to watch a game, instead of being with us, we feel that HE doesn't love us?
Why must we always allow the devil to play with our minds, when we know that all he does is to destroy?
Why do we find it difficult to listen, to say sorry, to cry, to admit we are wrong? Why?

Genuinely in my work through forgiveness I have learnt that being the first to forgive, to say I am sorry, to admit that I was wrong doesn't make me any less of a man or woman, but shows the world that I am strong. i am a diva and I am a man.

I speak today with great concern in my heart, I wish my friend will stop and listen, listen to what people are TRULY saying about her, and then reconcile with herself that she can never be right all the time.

I wish she will just learn that in other to have fun and enjoy life here on earth, one has to try to live at peace with each other.
I wish she will learn that fighting is not the way. As much as possible avoid fights, and seek the path of peace.

Right now I am so scared for I feel deep down in my heart that if and when she reads this she will flare up again and tell the whole world what a bad friend I am...

Don't think like that my dear,
I love you this is why I am doing this.
I love you this is why i will tell you the truth
And lastly any friend that never tells you (my friend) the truth is not your friend.


Tuesday, November 2, 2010

A little Lonely

Hi guys don't mind me and the topic above, he is not around that is why I am seeking for attention...loll... Nothing really much to say but wishing you a lovely, fruitful, interesting and fulfilled new month. I love this month because hey....guess what it is my birthday month. I will be a year older on the 10th of this month.

Take care of yourself and enjoy this month for I sure will.

Notez Bien: put this in your calendar: " the interface is on the 13th of this month, it promises to be a very interesting and dynamic episode...
Theme: "Transformative Technology and the future awards: : Chris Uwaje and Bolanle Austen-Peters


Sunday, October 24, 2010

Another Sunday

Hi everyone, before I say anything more let me use this opportunity to welcome Seun Idowu & Ibiene Fubara into the family, thank you for being a follower and becoming a member of the secretlilies family.
Now back to another sunday: Today I had a mind blowing experience with God. I learnt that forgiveness is the key to moving on in future...even if this is true how then can one forgive, is it easy?
How is it possible to forgive the father that was never there for me. The father that cheated on me and my mother. The father that one could never trust, or the mother who dumbed me in the dustbin as a baby...How can I?

How is it possible to forgive the man that raped me when I was 8 years. How is it possible to forget about the whole experience. He says I should forgive him but how, because of him I cannot understand what men, sex or the world. Because of him I am sick and tired of people telling me that I have to let go, forgive, and it will be okay with me...I am sick and tired of men, they hurt you, in fact it is in their nature to hurt the women and children.... How can I really?

Life is just so unfair, how can the police man that killed my son be set free. They didn't even do anything about it. They only just changed his department and left me grieving alone. You see Gbenga, my son was my only hope. He was all I had after his father left us..How then could he just be dead like that? How could God just let him die? They said he was a thief, but my son can never steal, he was on his way to our shop to help me with our daily sales, when the police man picked him up. My son begged and told the police man that he was only just going to help his mother. The drugged policeman insisted that he was a thief, took him to the cell, one thing led to another, he was killed.... Now ask me how should I forgive this man?

This world is a broken place, there is a lot of hate in the world, betrayal, injustice. All these creep in and form as peoples characters, carrying their guilt, shame, hatred, hurt everywhere they go, inflicting the people around them... Psychologist try their best to help, but how far can they go.......

Listening to people, reading about their experiences and feeling their hurt, I know one thing forgiveness and letting go is so difficult. We have to forgive all those we feel have hurt us in other to become better people in life....

N.B: I am on the pathway to forgiveness, I can tell you sometimes I still want to keep the anger, revenge, but it is easier to forgive and let go... After all my goal in life is to be a better person and show love to all around me......
Take care and please join me in the pathway to forgiveness

Enough of these emotionally stuff its time to party...Yesterday was my husband's birthday and we had a lovely time...I even realized that I love my bobo so much, loll. The enjoyment still continues as tomorrow the 25th of October is my wedding anniversary.....2 years of a blissful married life...
Trust me when you marry the right person, you will blossom like a beautiful red rose.


Monday, October 18, 2010

Mary Kay Ash

Mary Kay Ash born May 12, 1918 died November 22, 2001.
The name Mary Kay Ash rings a bell in the cosmetics world. My fascination about this woman was her ability to take her dream, make it a reality that benefitted a lot of families. ( P.S.The company still benefits families even as we speak).
Mary Kay Ash is an american business woman and the founder of Mary Kay Cosmetics Inc.
How did she start her company?
After her failed marriage to her first husband, single mother of three, she went to work. Frustrated at work when she was passed over for a promotion in favor of a man that she had trained, she retired. With the goal to write a book to assist women in business, this goal later turned into a business plan.
In September 1963, she and her second husband started the cosmetics company with 5000USD (#765,00 i.e. #153= 1USD). Even though her husband died before the company started fully, it didn't stop her. Her son Richard Rogers filled in for her husband as they both got to work in building the company and the brand. Her dream to make business easier for women and give them opportunities to make extra cash, paid up in the long run. The pink cadillacs awarded to the top sales people were the most visible sign of the company's success.

Now listen to her golden rule: " a plan designed for women to advance by helping others to succeed. Mary Kay Ash advocated praising people to success.
Her slogan: " God first, family second, career third". This slogan expressed her interest that the women in her company kept their lives in balance.

Mary Kay Ash started her business at age 45..........Now this saying that a fool at 40 is a fool forever can this be true?
Hey hold on I am not saying that Mary Kay was a fool. What I am saying is that the notion that you cannot succeed in business or life when you have passed a particular age is not true.

As at 2004 Mary Kay Inc. was one of the largest direct sellers of skin care and color cosmetics in the world, with 200 products and 1.1 million independent consultants worldwide in more than 30 markets. sales for 2003 totaled a record 1.8billion at wholesale level dollars.

"The genius of Mary Kay wasn't that she created a particularly unique product, but that she so brilliantly created a culture that mattered to very important markets: the women she recruited to sell Mary Kay products and the millions of consumers who bought them". Extracts baby....loll... I love this woman...

The story goes on and on... but the most important lesson is that, she followed her dream. her dream of helping women, came to life.
She is also a symbol for women all over the world. " You can have it all. Your family, God, children and a career, but there must be a balance".

I leave you today with this words: "whatever your dreams are, visions, goals, you can achieve it just be determined".
To fulfill ones goals in life, one must pass through a lot of hurdles but the reward is when one has seen his goals come to life.
Take care and have a wonderful week.

P.S: My baby's birthday is in 4 days, I can't wait, I am off to the mall, must look good for him don't you think..loll..

Friday, October 8, 2010

I Am Still Waiting

Why do some people have to wait so long for miracles in their lives and some others don't.
Why do some people have to shed blood before peace can be established and some people don't.
Why do some people have children and some never have till the day they exit this earth?
Why is life so unfair that I was born into this godforsaken family and all around me silver spoon kids are everywhere.
Why is life so difficult especially for those who try to be morally right and smooth for the wicked.
Why must I be the one that must apologize when I am innocent.
Why should my child be the one to fail, what happened to the child next door.

The why's of this world are so many, some times it's hard to comprehend. Like today's topic says I am still waiting.
I know there are a million of us out there still waiting for our own miracles, thinking to ourselves: when will it come?
Often times the only answer you get is: my sister, my brother just have patience, everything that has a beginning must have an end..

I want to believe them, but when will that end come?
The expected end, when will it come? I am fed up of waiting, but what can I do?

From the books I have read, stories I have heard, everybody had a waiting period. Some waited for years some just for a few months, while some only for a few days. I know I have to wait but I prayed that my waiting period will be shortened.

I know on thing though, truly whatever has a beginning must have an end, and the nemesis of a man must come back to hunt him in life. Even though the wicked seem to prevail, I know that their judgement day will come one day. I just have to learn this virtue " Patience".

Never forget this " I am still waiting"...loll......

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Happy Birthday Nigeria

Nigeria just celebrated its independence about 2 days ago, october 1. Everybody has asked what have we done in the past 50 years. What developpement has been attributed to this great Nation? No good roads, no electricity, poverty rate is high, corruption rate is high, the educational system is failing. So what good thing has happened in Nigeria?

The good thing about Nigerians is that despite the struggle and frustration in the country the citizens strive to become better, to have a better and more comfortable life. According to statistics Nigeria is one of the largest world emerging power in the world.... Is this a good thing for us? Or are they just pulling our legs? The telecommunication sector in the country is one of the fastest growing in the world. How a country where the poverty rate is high.


A lot of the Nigerians work without pay. A lot of them leave on less than 300 dollars annually, that is about 40,000 Naira. Nigeria is rated one of the most corrupt nations in the world. Not until recently we were rated a terriorist country because of the attempted bombing of the Nigerian, 25th december.

But for me despite all these stumbling blocks, like I love to call them, I still have hope.

I have hope like Martin Luther King. One day I know that Nigeria will change.

I know one day my children will be proudly declare that they are Nigerians.
I know that one day, we will have uninterrupted power supply.
I know that one day there will be good roads all over the Nation.
I know that one day there will be an end to ethnic discrimination and strife.
I know that one day Nigerian products will be exported all over the world like Chinese products today.
I know that one day Nigeria will truly become one of the worlds strongest power, where everything works.
But till that day comes, I will not seat down and criticized Nigeria, instead I will try and do the best I can do for my Nation.
This is my solemn pledge so help me God.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Long Time

Hello dears its been a while and I am so sorry. I don't have regular internet so I tend to be lazy to use the unregular
Anyways like I said the last time i will give you the full gist about my life in Port Harcourt.
On sunday the 19th of September was my father's birthday and conincidentally the day he retired from the work force. We went to church, which was long and boring and I almost fell of the pews due to sleep...(God please forgive me, lol).

Because of the long service we snicked out of the church to go have lunch.... the long awaited lunch. As soon as I saw the food I dropped my diet in the trash bin and ate like a starving child.

I know you are wondering why all these details, don't worry, all this is just to tell you that I had a lovely time.

Our lunch made me realise that there is nothing like family.....A good family is the bedrock of the society.

If you don't have strong family ties you have to do a recheck of your life and goals.
Notez Bien: it was said somewhere a while ago that the secret to long life is a strong and loving family.

Take care of yourself and will chat later.... I need to go now, my friend is preparing healthy Indomie for me.


Saturday, September 18, 2010

Another Wahala!!!!!!!

I am now in Port Harcourt, very happy about that, but I had an ordeal today.
Very early in this morning I got a text that my flight was canceled and was to be rescheduled. Quickly I rushed down to the airport only to discovered that it looked like I was the only one who got the text. When I got to the counter, I foolishly told them my about the text and they told me that I had to wait and go on the 6pm flight, I was shocked and disappointed.

This was 9.30 am in the morning where was I to go? How could I wait for hours in a boring airport. Then I thought to go to the office (that is the airline's)....Now this is where the story began, the lady that worked in the office told me that I shouldn't have told them about the text in the first place. She printed out my ticket told me to go to another counter and check in like I was just coming. Gladly I took the advise and did as she said.
You can imagine, I got on the flight, my seat was there and I got to Port Harcourt by 12.30.....

Now my question is why did they then send the text message?
Secondly they do not convey information properly. How is it that the attendants didn't know anything about a canceled flight?
Thirdly when I get a text like that again I will not say a word.

It's good to be in Port Harcourt, I have just been here for hours and I am already being pampered from getting new shoes to an update of the family gist....

It's good to be at home with family this I must confess.

What do I think about Port Harcourt? It hasn't changed much and it rains don't forget I grew up here and it will always be my home.

Take care and have fun this weekend, cos I sure am......
will keep you posted.


Friday, September 17, 2010

See Me See Wahala

Hmmm my friends I am confused and I will like your opinion..... Yesterday night at about 7pm I was driving out of the Palms, when I spotted a young guy, handsome, tall dark etc you know the features now, lol, hold on I forgot to add, well dressed, but there was a but, he was wearing sunglasses.........

Now my dear friends, I had to triple check to be sure that I as saw the guy. How could he be wearing sun shade or sun glasses at that time of the night?

With all curiosity, I consulted my dictionary and he told me that the meaning of sunglasses or sun shades as some people call it is a : " glasses tinted to protect the eyes from sunlight or glare"......

So tell me where was the sunlight at 7pm in the night or the glare?

Why do we wear things in the name of fashion and not know the meaning or how and when it is being used?

A lot of us copy a lot of things we don't even know their origin, whether good or bad.

I think if I am to wear a dress I need to know when it is appropriate. For example wearing a dinner gown to the movies, that is a big NO.

What about wearing a party dress for shopping or a mini skirt on an okada.... lol....i know you are laughing but a lot of people wear rubbish, all in the name of fashion.

Despite the fact that fashion is growing and becoming more creative by the day, we should learn to know what suits us, and when and where to wear certain clothes. I don't want to be wicked but a tiny little voice within me, wanted the young guy with the sunglasses to trip and fall,

Anyways its time for me to log out, I guess we will see next time....

P.S.. please stay tuned for some new exciting pictures about me having a lovely time....don't forget I am getting ready to hit the road.

Saying a big welcome to the new member of the secretlilies family, Remi. Thank you for following us and we hope you will learn a lot from us and we from you...
Have a nice day girl....


Thursday, September 16, 2010


Its so funny how excited I get anytime I am traveling, be it within the country or outside the country, I get butterflies.
I can't wait to see all my friends, my family, my hood, if you know what I mean, LOL... I just can't wait.
Even in my excitement I will like to share something I learnt listen....loll.....

Yesterday, I had a lovely bible study and it was all about God, the topic that struck me most was how to hear from God. People say they hear from God, is it true? Everybody wanted to know how it was possible and how one could hear God speak.

Deep down I know it is true and its possible to hear from God, because I do hear from God when I am a good girl, loll.

God doesn't talk to everybody in a particular way, I can only tell you how God talks to me, for you it will be different. What I can surely say is that when God talks to you, there is an eternal excitement that cannot be understood by men. It's a beautiful feeling which indescribable.
I have also learnt that each time I am closer to God, I hear clearly from him. When I drift away, or get distracted with the things of the world, His voice become fainter and until I stop hearing from Him completely.

The question is how can one stay in his presence every time? Simple by meditating on the word of God, in the place of prayer etc...

How can one hear from God when there are a lot of unanswered prayers?

This is my challenge, sometimes I am angry with God that I don't even want to talk to him, I run away. I don't want to trust him, anymore, but after i have thrown tantrums and sulked for a while, I run back to him because there is no other way....

Do I actually hear from God? Yes I must confess that I do hear from him, especially when I tune my ears and stay in His presence, after all He says if you seek Me you will find........

Will I get confused and frustrated with God again? Yes I know I will, cos I am human, but I will never leave Him for He is my all.

Do I still have unanswered prayers? Yes I do, in fact a lot, but I trust and wait on Him patiently for they will be answered, one day.

Notez bien: as we go home this weekend I want us to reflect on him, take a few minutes, hours anytime to hear from Him. Take His word study it and ask Him to speak to you.

P.S. I am off to Port Harcourt and I know I will have a lovely time. Don't worry I will gist you all about my experience.
Take care.


Sunday, September 12, 2010

Na Wa Oh Another Sunday Again

Ahha God its another sunday again and nothing has happened. I did they same thing, I always do, I went to church, I prayed, I cried to You, I worshipped with my whole heart and still nothing has changed.

What should I do? Where should I run to? (sigh) I don't know.
Did I do anything wrong in life? I have taken a while to run through my short life, the only sins committed weren't major, just little lies, stubbornness here and there and that was all. Hmmm(sigh) maybe I did more than that took something that weren't mine, but hey I repented. Its not so bad: people in this world have done worse. A lot of my mates did a lot of bad things in the past, so hideous one couldn't fathom, but it looks as though they are now better than I am.......What is the point then?

How can I cope? Sometimes I want to tell You that I cannot do it anymore. This business of living a faithful life is killing me. I try to be faithful and it seems as though nothing good comes out of it. I am tempted to look the other way......

Life!!!!! What can one say. Its become more and more difficult to deal with it and still keep smile. Sometimes its as though you have been betrayed, nothing seems to work.
Being good has become a chore and a difficult one at that, but despite all the difficulties in life, just hang in there, cos its just but a while. For surely one day it will come, and all the frustrations will be over.

Note: this week determine in your heart to be happy no matter what happens.

Take care and have a nice week


Sunday, September 5, 2010

Another Sunday

Hmmm God another sunday again.
Another church service, another experience with you.
Its so funny when I get to church I am depressed cos all my prayers are unanswered, but then I come into this gathering and my hope in God is revitalized. I can move mountains. I can conquer snakes and scorpions. I can be the best in whatever I do, i leap out of the gathering with the world and its worries under my feet, but will this be forever?
What does monday hold for me, will it be like last monday, with one disappointment or the other. Will I cry myself to sleep, like I did tuesday night when Dayo told me that it was over, or crack my brain about what food to feed the children for I am out of cash. Everywhere has been over turned but can't find even 1 kobo. Will my car break down on thursday like it usually does, oh God I need a new car, I know there are millions out there who don't have a car, but there are also millions out there who own several cars.
As I think of all theses problems, my leap becomes a walk, and slowly I walk to the car, this car that I have no confidence in praying that God will please hear me as I drive, protect me and take me home.
I want to trust you God but its tough at times, at times I find my self doubting that you can help me. At times it looks like there isn't any hope for me.
(Complains) Then why did you create me? Why did you say that I was made in your own image? Why did you say that all the good things of life you will give me? Why all the promises, that I never see?
But then again as I drive down my street to my house, I see this mad man looking for food in the dustbin, I see the small homeless children run to meet me shouting aunty abeg help us for we never eat at all. I see the blind man, who cannot walk unless he is assisted. Immediately shame consumes me. I have worried about all the things that I don't have, and have forgotten of all the things i have. At least I don't have to sleep on the bridge. I forget that at least I have a car even though rickety but something that can move me about. Some people have to trek kilometers away just to look for their daily bread.
(Long sigh) I am sorry for being ungrateful, at least I have life and I am healthy. Forgive me and teach me to trust You, for I know You will always keep to Your word....

P.S. when you think that life is so bad, you just have to turn to the other side and you will know that there are people who have worse cases than you, in the world.

Happy Sunday

Thursday, September 2, 2010

What is Your View Of God!!

Everybody has his or her own view about God and what they believe in. For me my view about Him is that He is a God that neither sleeps nor slumber. This means that when I am asleep He is there watching over me. When I am awake He is also there protecting me least I fall. A few days ago I read a daily devotional and I laughed a lot at some little children's view about God, written to their pastors, here are some of them:

"Dear Pastor I know God loves everyone but He never met my sister".
Dear Minister, I will like to bring my dog to Church on sundays. She is only a mutt but she is a good christian."

"I would like to read the Bible, but I will read it more if they put it on TV."

Dear Pastor, I would like to go to heaven some day because I know my big brother will not be there".

A father over head his young daughter talking during a thunderstorm one day. The older daughter said as a matter-of-faclty, "that thunder you just heard is God moving His furniture".
The younger daughter nodded her head like she understood and looked out the window at the pouring rain for a minute before she replied: " yes, He just moved His waterbed, too".

lol even the Bible says that only when we think like a child will we be able to enter the kingdom of God.

Search your heart and think deeply, what is your own view of God!!!


Tuesday, August 24, 2010

The Simple Rule of Relationship

For the past week I have done an extensive research on the success of relationships especially in marriages and I have come to realize that really the author John Gray of " Men are from Mars Women are from Venus", really knew what he meant when he wrote that book. Man and Woman are two different species, both of them come together to build a good and solid relationship.
Why are there many broken homes in the society today? Why is it that people are no longer trusted in their relationships, Men and Women don't trust themselves. Why is it that love and romance dies away only months into the marriage. What is it that we are both doing that hinders the growth of our marriages?

In reading this book (Fascinating Womanhood), I have learnt this: "there are just two simple things women and men need for their relationships to work. listen to this " the center of a woman's happiness in marriage is to be loved, but the center of a man's is to be admired" Fascinating Womanhood by Helen Andelin.

This struck me as very surprising. that means things we bother ourselves with are only secondary in respect to the simple rule. If men and woman both put this rule to practice, the world will be a better place, don't you think? Relationships will last longer. Healthy, beautiful, confident children will be brought into this world.

Notez bien: it doesn't take anything to be the fool sometimes, especially in marriage. Its doesn't take anything to be the first to say sorry. It doesn't take anything to just admire the other person, despite their faults. It doesn't take anything to love. You are not less of a man, or a slave if you do all of the above and abide by the simple rule that men love to be admired, women just want to be loved.

Food for thought: Make the first move in improving your relationship.
Don't forget the simple rule:
Admire your man,
Love your woman.

Take care

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Hmmmm (Sighs)

I am so scared, angry, jealous, envious and I don't want her to come, but she has come.
They say I should act normal, but how can I?
How can I be normal, when I know that they are laughing at me.
How can I be normal, when I know that she has taken everything I ever owned.
How can I be normal, when I know her aim is to see be destroyed.
But she has gotten everything good that life can ever offer. What about me? The good one. The angel. Why not me instead of her? Why? (Sobbing)

I hope you can understand, why I cannot act normal around her.
How can I act like everything is normal? They say I should at least act like a politician.
They say that if I show my feelings, I will be declared a jealous person.
Do I not have the right to be jealous?
Do I not have the right to show at least, an atom of envy
Impossible things are expected from one each day. Difficult I must say, difficult.

Every time they say, don't do this, don't do that. Don't act like that, don't behave this way.
Sometimes, I just feel as though I am a little chick, fighting its way out of the shell.
hmmmmmm(sighs again) I am tired and I want this to be over.
Please help me, somebody help me, PLEASE!!!!

I am looking, hoping and waiting for my own miracle.
I am fed up of being jealous, envious and angry at every success I come across........

Human beings, all over the world, sometimes feels an atom of envy or a little jealousy towards something or someone.....This is human.....
As I read the lamentations of the person above, I realize that sometimes, I may feel like this. Sometimes I wonder why should something good happen to an evil person, and not me, the good one.

Is it right to be envious of that person, even if it's just for a second?

Notez Bien: "All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better", Ralph Waldo Emerson
Have a lovely weekend.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Amazing Race

This is the era of reality shows, one new one sprouting up every day, enticing the audience or sometimes just pointless and a waste of money. One of the shows that I have fallen in love with is the Amazing Race (which can be seen on Sony Entertainment Television). This series is so dear to my heart especially the season 2 of Amazing Race Asia. The winner of the Amazing Race Asia season 2 was Adrian and Collin.

A Little Information: Amazing race Asia, is a realty show where the contestants ( 10 teams of 2 with pre-exiting relationship embark on a race around the world to win US$100,000.

Time table for season 2's Participants:
1. travelled to 4 continents.
2. visited 28 cities
3. visited 10 countries
4. Distance: 51,534 kilometers
5. travelled 32,023 miles
6. number of legs 12.

Countries Participants Visited:
Singapore, Philippines, People's Republic of China, New Zealand, Japan, South Korea, Germany, Czech Republic, Hungary, South Africa.

In 2009, Amazing Race series, was nominated for an international Emmy Award for Best Non Scripted Entertainment. The race is simple amazing. It is a race around the world.
The most interesting thing about season 2, is that Adrian one of the winners was the first hearing impaired contestant in the Amazing Race Franchise. He proved to the world that despite his hearing deficiency he can do anything. He can compete with anybody with or without deficiency.

Food For Thought: everyday we seat down and think about how badly life has treated us. We complain about the atrocities we see on the road, each day. We complain about the simple benefits we are suppose to get and yet cannot get it, because the Government isn't capable of fulfilling their promises. Regularly there is news of one natural disaster or the other. Life just seems very unfair for a lot of us.
Some of us have parents who threw us away a babies, some where born into abject poverty, Life once again has just been unfair....

Before we go on and on about all the things that aren't working in our lives, take a look at our Star for today Adrian, who was born with a hearing deficiency, but overcame it. Who didn't allow himself to wallow in self pity, but instead showed the world that He to could do it.

Notez bien: anything is possible if we just set our hearts to do it. Instead of spending time counting all the ill luck brought upon us by life, look for what will make you stand out for good.

Happy new week,

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Our Population, An Advantage

Good morning and a happy sunday to you to.....just gisting you about my experience this morning..
I went to the Palms by 10.30, to buy Shoprite's most sought after bread. Thinking that there wasn't going to be a long queue, because it was a sunday, I strolled into Shoprite at about 10.45.....Omo!!!! the queue was long, it was as though people didn't sleep. They were all waiting for this bread..... After standing for over 30 minutes to get the bread, I had to wait for another 30 minutes to be able to pay......
Yes!!!!! As frustrating as it was, waiting for so long just to pick up and pay for a loaf of bread, I was amazed.

How was it possible that Shoprite was able to attract this crowd? What goods were they selling that the other stores didn't sell? Was it their pricing? Was it their customer service? Was it just their brand? Or was it the factor of Our Population?

Nigeria is said to be have at least 150 million inhabitants. Lagos State alone accounts for about 14 million, in some areas that is the population of a whole country..... The poverty rate is high, but businesses are able to thrive very well and quiet fast despite the poverty level....

I have come to the conclusion that our large population can be a big disappointment for us or can be used to our advantage.....Take a look at China...
Today, a lot of products are being fabricated China....I can say that half of the clothes are own are made in China like the french will say fabrique en Chine.......
Leverage: they have used their population of about a billion to create an advantage for themselves....

If we seat back and think we will be able to use our population for the good of the Nation, and also the world.....
Notez Bien: don't forget the story of the akara woman...the lady that sells akara (beans cake) and makes between #15,000 to #40,000 a day ( $100 to $250 a day). In a month she makes #600,000 to #1,200,000 i.e. $3000 to $7,500).... This woman is an illiterate to the core....but like the Chinese, she has leveraged on the Nigerian population.

P.S. go make a killing in whatever you do this week. Have a great week.

Thursday, August 12, 2010


What did I do to do?
Why have you decided to single me out?
Please answer me, before I loose my mind....
What is it?
Ehhen...I am warning you....I ask you again...What is it?
I have not hurt anybody, I do not lie, I do not steal, the last time I checked I have lived a good moral life..
The question again: why me?
I do not deserve this...
Everybody is laughing at me.. I can feel it....Anytime they walk pass me, they giggle...they laugh..
What is so funny? I often want to ask them, but I can't.. I have lost it...
Why bother....

Hmmm life I ask again, what did I do to you?
I know you send Mr karma for his yearly tour around the world... I didn't ask for him to visit me....
In fact when I checked, I wasn't on the list... Simple reason I am a good person..

But, why did he come? Why did he visit me? Why...
I always thought that bad things don't happen to good people, but now I can't say...
I have been good all my life, yet I get visits very often from Mr Karma
I ask again for the hundredth time..Why me?

Notez bien: Honestly why bad things happen to good people, is a mystery, but I know this for sure. When life seems so unbearable and all hope is lost: it means that life is going to change for the better. It means that the future will be bright...Just hang in there a little longer.....

Take care of yourself and trust me, it will get better.....
Good morning and thank God its friday...

Saturday, August 7, 2010


Hello fellows and what's up? Saying welcome to our new member in the house, Anne and thank you for following secretlilies.......whoa......we appreciate....
Now I don't know where my old wall went to? I just had it up for a day or two and it has disappeared. Oh please come back...where are you? I want you back? ( sobbing....loll...)....

Its the weekend, and what is there to do? what can one do?... Today is the day we usually do everything we have piled up over the week, and after the days chore, we are just fagged out and need some rest... What? Can't any man just sleep and wake up and viola money is by the bedside...loll...
Well my dears, life isn't like that. Life doesn't work like that....In other to succeed we have to work.......

I have decided that I want to sew,,.....hmmm see me now, thinking it was so easy. Fine I went to the market which is (shoprite,, don't mind me , I am not serious can my market be shoprite) anyways I bought my material, and headed home. Determined to sew myself a table cloth, the old fashioned way... thread and God my back hurts and I haven't even started, yet. I spent 2 hours just stitching one end to the other....Phew!!!! I thought sewing was as simple as ABC?

The simple things we take for granted are not as easy as we think....magic doesn't just happen, we make the magic happen.

So let's sit back and make the magic happen this weekend...

P.S: I am not a Nollywood fan, but there are some actors or actresses I respect like Olu Jacobs, Joke Silver, Stella Damascus I am a little excited that I am having a date with Stella Damascus in Church tomorrow...Mennn!!!! I love church these days its so interesting and You remember yesterday, the talk about FUN.....I wish everybody will realize that life it too short...why not enjoy it while it lasts....
Notez Bien:

Never take anything for granted...
Take care of yourself and enjoy your weekend

Friday, August 6, 2010


What exactly is the meaning of fun?
According to my computer, fun can be defined as : enjoyment, amusement or lighthearted pleasure.
Well from this definition I can comfortable say that for the past 1 month I have had the pleasure of experiencing these : enjoyment, amusement and lighthearted
From the magnificent experience of tasting the wisdom of John C. Maxwell to the roller coster adventure ride of Michelle Mckinny Hammond the relationship specialist, I can proudly say that I have stepped into the month of August a better person, a better leader...(lol, abeg help me oh, I am blowing my trumpet....hahahaha).......

The must important thing about life is that one can have fun and learn.
I have learnt (while having fun), that it doesn't take a title to become a leader, it takes being a servant to become one.
I have learnt (While having fun) that a leader is a leader by example.
I have learnt (while creating fun) that if you cannot have a good relationship with your friends, you will not have a good relationship with your marriage.
I have learnt (while generating fun) that relationships demand a lot of things from us.... like....patience, love, tolerance and above all forgiveness......
Now you can see why I said: that I stepped into this month with every necessary tool. Omo come meet me for lessons...loll.. ..

If I practice all that I have learnt I will be a better person
Notez Bien: now I will like to tell you a little secret...I have secretly been holding a grudge against some of my friends...its like they don't remember I exit anymore....
As I drop my pen, I am going to call them to harass them...haba why haven't you called me? I am still alive

Life is better that way don't you think?

Take care of yourself and learn to spot the fun in every situation

Wednesday, August 4, 2010


August is here and with it comes some apprehension. The year that just started has almost ended. In a bout of uncertainty you wonder, what are your accomplishments thus far.....
Maybe something good will come, wrapped up in a present box, but
waiting is not an option? How patient can one be.
Well let's just wait and see
Or should I?
Or Shouldn't I?
Maybe I should just rebel and do what is in my heart.
But it will hurt them.
Hmmm!!!!! I cannot help it, its for my own good, not theirs.
Well I will try, I just have to.

Nobody can see it, only me.
I will just hang in there and wait....

Sometimes we are faced with a dilemma, confused about what to do....
You are not alone, I feel like that sometimes, but then I know its only for a while.
Like the song that says "I will get there, I will get there someday", I will scale through.
Despite the ups and downs, enjoy this month,
for it is going to be a month of wonderful adventures...

Friday, July 30, 2010


Hi fellows, in the space of one month I will be talking about opportunities and its importance in our lives. Sometimes I may use real life illustrations, sometimes just words of encouragement, sometimes something that will serve as an eye opener for opportunities. I hope that every word I say, will make a meaningful impact in your life.....
Now enough of the talk, let's get down to I am so excited because I am going to meet, for the first time, the writer and the relationship specialist "Michelle Mckinney Hammond... I can't wait for that. I love her books especially, " The Power Of Being A Woman". Sorry guys, I am not being a feminist and the book isn't either, I strongly recommend you buy it for your female friends, its a blessing".......
Before I drop my pen, I will like to leave you with these words......." someone once told me......every man gets his opportunity in life, usually wrapped in something funny and most of the time unattractive. What makes the difference is one's ability to be able to decipher it and use it for ons's good.....
Extracts From The Daily Manna of Dr Chris Kwakpovwe, 30th July, 2010
" I asked for Strength and God gave me Difficulties to make me strong.
I asked for Wisdom and He gave me Problems to solve.
I asked for Prosperity and God gave me Brain and Brawn to work.
I asked for Courage and God gave me Danger to overcome.
I asked for Love and God gave me Troubled people to help.
I asked for Favor and God gave me Opportunities.
I received nothing I worked for.....
I received everything I needed.....
A little story to add to this....... " for the past 5 months I have been looking for a french, french person to practice my french with. I wanted it so desperately, because I didn't want to lose my flow of the french language. Everyday I begged God to give me a friend, who was french. Everyday I asked around for a french community. Everyday I searched the internet looking for someone, anyone who could speak french with me.....
Then yesterday evening, lo and behold, two men walked into the reading room, one white and the other an african, and they were both speaking french. Here was I sitting down, staring at them, with my mouths wide open. I tried to psyche myself to get up and talk to them... I was still psyching myself till they left. And you know what; the men were even polite enough to ask me a question, ( but of course in Imagine that.......An opportunity lost.....
I have asked for a long while and he gave it to me, but I shied away from it.......A lot of us are like this, and we wonder why things don't work for us.....
Now I am back to square one looking for, begging for and praying for yet another opportunity to get a french french friend.
Notez Bien: Don't lose yours this weekend. Have a great weekend.

Thursday, July 29, 2010


Time was ticking, my hands sweaty, no courage within, but I knew I had to do it, I just had to do it. Even though it was going to hurt me. Even though I was going to make some few enemies along the way, I just had to do it, it was for the best.
Walking down the corridor, I considered turning back, running away, after all, I had endured for a while and could still endure more. Why stop now?
But the voice within prompted me, reminding me of what my teacher in school once said "the oppressed will forever be oppressed until the day he realizes that he is too is a master, then he becomes the oppressor". I have to become the oppressor. I have to say no to this slavery. I have suffered for so long. I had watched the pain in my children's eyes for years and turned away pretending that it was just a phase and the hurt will go, but it never did. I have to stand up. I have to do something before I lose everything.
Tolu, my darling, my poor boy, my heart, no longer talks to me. He feels it's my fault, he had told me several times to just go away, to leave, but I refused. "What will people say ?" I thought to myself. I will be ridiculed amongst my circle of friends, but I didn't care. I would go on with it, I would leave him.
I can remember the way his eyeballs grew bigger because of the rage within him, I stepped back as usual, trying to protect myself from his rage, then suddenly I remembered that I wasn't alone, my friend was there with me.
There was no way he was going to touch me, not any more.
With the little dignity I had left, I walked out of the house, vowing never to return again.
I know it will not be easy, I know that life will be unfair, but at least I have my angels. At least they no longer hate me, I am their friend now, cos I finally listened.
I don't know what it going to happen, but I know for sure, I am never going back. I am never looking backward, I will just strive to do my best.....who knows life may smile on me again, but I don't want to bank on that............ Maybe marriage was never meant for me, I wish I had known, I will never had gone through this pain.
For now I can only say " had I known", but that is as far as I will go. I will make a life for myself come what may.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010


Hi guys before I go into details, I will like to say a big SORRY to my friend EHIMEN for forgetting her birthday on sunday. I had a lot on my mind, I am very sorry girlfriend and I pray you forgive me. "HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY". Secondly I want to say thank you to a new friend, I just meet. I don't know why God brought us together at this time, but He sure knows what he is doing. Because I want to say that sunday, was one of the best things that happened to me.. Keep the flag high my dear.....
Now back to my confused state.... this doesn't always happen every time but, have you ever been in a situation where you are just confused? You don't know what to do? You don't know who to talk to? And it looks like the whole world is just ganging up against you?
Well this is the state I am in. I am confused, but then again I ask my self why? Wasn't I supposed to do all that I did?
Did I make a mistake along the way? What is it actually?
After fretting up and down, I have come to the conclusion: "I am going on a research rampage". All the people I have talked to say : " go on with the plan". I know this is a decision I need to make, it may hurt a lot of people, it may not, but I know it's the right thing to do.
I feel so awful, but I have to make that decision.
I feel so bad, but I know it's for the best
I feel so alone, but I know that no matter what, I will always have a FRIEND
I feel so afraid because I am scared of what people are going to say, but then I have searched my conscience and I know that I have done the right thing.
I am leaving now because it is time to take the decision, I don't know if I should let you know or not, but I will try.
I will keep you posted for I know you will console me when it burst.

Thursday, July 22, 2010


Hi dears, how are you?
I just want to say a BIG thank you to all my readers AND followers. Without you, writing will be a lot more difficult, THANK YOU.
For the past 2 weeks I have meet a lot of cool, creative people and I am wondering how can this be? People like this in Nigeria....hmmmmm!!!!
In the past 2 weeks I have learnt a lot of things, in my writing, my business and my marriage that I haven't learnt in over a year.
In the past 2 weeks I have been criticized so much that I have made up my mind to be the best in everything I do.
In the past 2 weeks I have learnt that I need patience for everything.
I have learnt that it is not about how many books or articles or journals or how much you have or earn, or your family name, or the connections you have, but about how well you do whatever it is you are doing.
I have learnt that patience is the key to every creative mind.
How can I be patient especially when I am looking at the ceiling and begging God to please send money down from heaven like he sent manna for the children of Israel in the bible?
How can I be patient when I want to see my books in print and tell everybody who is anybody that I am a writer and I have published a book? How can I? but :
I have learnt that it takes a bamboo 6 years to shoot out of the soil and 6 months to reach its full length. Why?
Good example of patience.........
Every successful man, woman, organization, minister, church, marriage, company, relationship etc takes years of patience and learning before it becomes the best.
2 weeks ago I was in hurry to get my book in print, but now after learning about the life of a bamboo, I am ready to wait.
It's not going to be easy for me because naturally I am an impatient person, but I am willing to learn.
I will wait...even if it takes me 6 years like the bamboo, I will wait and learn.
Food for thought: this week let's strike a deal...develop the ability to be patient, in everything you do and with everybody you meet. It will not be easy, especially with all that surrounds you, but it will come, little by little.
Notez Bien: I hope we are still reading our books.
Confession: " keeping my rule of 5 is the most difficult thing I have ever done, but I am

Tuesday, July 20, 2010


Have you ever be disappointed in your life? have you ever wanted something so badly but it never came?
i have asked why a million times and i haven't got a response...........
have you ever felt like a fool?
have you ever been taken for a fool?
have you been mistreated because you don't have money?
right now i don't know what to do.........
How can i trust somebody, with my work, with money with everything as a friend and then i get Slapped at the back, and all because of money.
Hey GOD i am broken down, beaten i don't know what to do.
Where will i get the money to redo it again.
Every night i seat down and look up at the ceiling, hoping that money will just fall down from heaven. or the problem will just go away.
cos i have tried everything.
Ah this one i am so hurt i don't know what to do to the person.
They say i should forgive, but how can i forgive, i preach about it, but how can i. forgiveness is the key to moving forward.
Whoever said that, should have told me that it wasn't easy.
because i just don't know how to forgive right now but i will try.
don't worry, i have cried, i have wailed and i have given up.
but i will do the work.
i will continue to do my best
i will just continue, please GOD help me.

Friday, July 16, 2010

The Rule Of 5

Hello everybody and what's up? I am so excited I can't wait to pour out what I have just learnt... "the rule of 5... Before I do that I will to say this JOHN C. MAXWELL ROCKS. He is an epitome of wisdom, I can honestly say that like Solomon, he asked God for wisdom to teach His people.
I went for his seminar 2 days ago and I can honestly say that I learnt so much. One of the things that i took with me from the seminar: " the rule of 5". The simplicity and yet the difficulty of the rule, makes it unique and when followed, is the key to success.
The example given: " if a man takes an axe and cuts a tree, but only cuts that tree 5 times a day, not more than 5 not less than 5, and he makes sure he does this everyday, one day that tree will fall down. When it falls down one cannot tell. It may fall down within weeks, it may take 1 year, or 6 months, depending on the size of the tree". The keynote to this: is determination, consistency and discipline in whatever one does. Now he (John) said that when you apply the rule of 5 in your business, in whatever you do you will succeed.
First of all find out what your passion, your talent, your gift is. Because, trust me you don't want to spend the rest of your life doing something that you don't have a passion for. When you have identified your passion, you now look for your rule of 5. Mind you it may take you a while to find your rule of 5, but when you do it, it will be worth it.
Now John C. Maxwell said that he decided to be a writer 30 years ago, and then he looked for his rule of 5. He said as a writer everyday: he reads, he thinks, he files, he asks questions and he writes, he does this everyday. On his birthdays, christmas, sundays, EVERYDAY. It doesn't mean that he spends all day doing all theses things, but he makes sure that he does it everyday. Today he may write for 10 hours tomorrow he may just write for a minute. The thing is that he has been doing this for the past 30 years, and has become so good at it.
Notez Bien: His business EQUIP is the most successful business of its kind all over the world, and it has been this way because they practice the rule of 5 everyday.
P.S. Michael Phelps the great swimmer who is just 25 years old, who won 8 olympic gold medals at Beijing in 2008, says he swims everyday. No matter the day, be it a sunday, christmas, his birthday, its freezing, he swims everyday.
In summary what i am saying is that: "in other to succeed in life one has to be determined and discipline. It takes discipline to find your rule of 5 and do it everyday. It takes discipline to swim everyday of your life, no matter the odds.
For me I have decided to be a translator and a writer.... what is my rule of 5?:
Everyday i read (comprises of english and french)
Everyday i write
Everyday i translate
Everyday i ask questions
Everyday i keep files...
this is my rule of 5. what about yours?
Recommended book: " THE 21 IRREFUTABLE LAWS OF LEADERSHIP by John C. Maxwell
Have a lovely weekend.

Monday, July 12, 2010


Hi it been a while, i have been so busy, sorry for leaving you guys alone with a word. Anyway I am back once again. In future I will like to talk about money and making money, but not for today. In the mean time I will like to say the world cup is finally over and Spain deserves to win the cup. I just wish one of the African countries took the cup home. But, oh well it took Spain years to get here and I know that : so long as there is life there is hope. Who knows what will happen in Brazil 2014....
Now I will like to tell you a little secret, its about marriage. This thing that they say opposite attracts I feel strongly that it is very true. I have observed my husband for a while and I have come to realize that, we both have too love whatever the other person loves. That's the sacrifice about it. Now let me talk about channels, my husband loves National Geographic Channel, Discovery Channel, Animal Channel and the likes. I can not stand all those channels to me they are boring and to stiff. Now guess what channels I like...please don't laugh at me and I don't think its my I love Disney Channel, Cartoon Network, Universal Channel, TV5 and the likes. My baby can't stand it for one second and he cannot comprehend it. But you know what, we have come to an agreement. We watch what each other likes, just in other for us to be together. Even though I have to sleep through his Discovery Channel days or him mine we do this cos in marriage with all our difference, we have to make sacrifices. Differences come with shhhhhhhhhhhh please don't let him know I told
Ciao and Happy new week.
P.S: Learn to love your spouses differences its worth the while.

Saturday, July 3, 2010


Hi whats up? special eyah to Ghana for losing yesterday night, they should have not let Uruguay to equalize, in the first place. Anyways welcome home, you did a good job never the less. Now back to the main topic of today: I am doing something that has to do with the Niger Delta Basin and The Amazon Basin. I have found out that but basins are very similar in mammals, resources, terrain, rain forest, oppression and let me add now insecurity. As i studied the Niger Delta basin, something struck me, i was amazed at all the natural resources available in that basin, untouched and untapped. One of the resources that struck me was the Mangrove Pulp.
The Mangrove Pulp is a substance that is used for the production of paper, and do you want to know what it is being used for, as of today? it is being used for as local firewood. You can imagine the waste!!!! In my research i found out that a sample had been sent to a German company, after which the German company proposed coming to set up a factory/ office for the production of paper in Niger Delta, but like everything in Nigeria, till today as we speak nothing has been done concerning that. My question is this, if we have so much natural resources then why are we only concentrating on one? Why are we killing ourselves and causing insecurity because of it? Why is the country divided because of our precious black gold?
A geologist told me that they were told that in Nigeria, there isn't any natural resources on this earth that cannot be found, if looked for. It may not be in large quantities but at least they can be found. Now my question: "what can we as individuals do to change our nation? Because from what i have seen the government, is a forgotten issue, our parents era is over and it is time for us to take up the staff and right the wrongs our parents, fore fathers, presidents, politicians have done. Maybe someone reading out there can cash into the idea of bringing back the German company for the production of paper, despite the odds. Think of what it will do for our nation and the Niger Delta basin.
Before i get of for my weekend off, i will like to chip in something" i stumbled on an advert: "vacation in the Amazon rainforest". "Family vacations in the amazon forest, learn to live the life without civilization". For me my idea of a vacation will never be an experience in a rainforest, looking at wildlife and mammals, but those vacation resorts are making a fortune. Why can't Niger Delta be a tourist haven for all the crazy tourists who love adventures?
P.s "i pray for the black gold, our curse to dry up so that our senses can be put to use in the name of Jesus".

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Sometimes You Want To Hurt Back

Have you ever been in a situation where you just want to lash out at the ones you love. When you feel like hurting them back because of what they have done to you or because of the hurt you feel right now. Have you ever wondered why it is only the people you love that hurt you and see your pain. Have you ever wondered why in spite of the hurt, in spite of what they have done to you, you are expected to say sorry first because society dims fit or it is the right thing to do? Do not worry you are not alone. Everyone at one time or the other has been hurt by a loved one. It may have been so bad that suicide became an option.
I am here to tell you that you should just let go and move on. Forgiving and forgetting is not easy at all, don't let anybody lie to you, but when you choose to forgive and forget, it is one of the best thing in life.
As this new month begins, decide in your heart to forgive everyone, forgive your love ones, forgive your husband or wife who has cheated on you several times, forgive your father who was never there for you as a child, forgive your dear friend who betrayed you, forgive your colleagues who set you up, forgive everybody no matter the crime and trust me life will be better.
Take care of yourself and have a blessed, fulfilled, fantastic new month. Ciao