tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post8549048095767935879..comments2023-10-25T03:38:01.480-07:00Comments on secretlilies: SEXIbifiri Kamsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03935480773984052778noreply@blogger.comBlogger34125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-62727637834084466342011-09-11T19:03:51.680-07:002011-09-11T19:03:51.680-07:00lolsssss. We were just having this conversation to...lolsssss. We were just having this conversation today. Nigerian, Jamiacan. Nobody's mum had given them a talk more comprehensive than...if he touches you, you'll get pregnant. Like you said, it just makes your mom look credibility somewhat.<br />Definitely going to have long beautiful talks with my kids.<br /><br />Rhapsody got it!Gingerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10294850491382303707noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-63846803366945493632011-09-08T15:15:48.922-07:002011-09-08T15:15:48.922-07:00I didn't get a sex talk either, but i got mini...I didn't get a sex talk either, but i got mini sex talks in between conversations though, and that wasn't bad. In this day and age, i don't think kids can be that ignorant about sex cause it's all over the media.<br /><br />Adiya<br />http://museorigins.blogspot.com<br />http://museorigins.comMuse Originshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13926790332096043066noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-38334654917981653692011-09-07T07:38:50.711-07:002011-09-07T07:38:50.711-07:00I didn't get the sex talk until I was "to...I didn't get the sex talk until I was "too old" lol,...dayorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04464749657251751761noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-13540832792792498692011-09-05T03:28:54.254-07:002011-09-05T03:28:54.254-07:00@Vale thank you. i checked your blog its fantastic...@Vale thank you. i checked your blog its fantastic.<br />@Blessing thank youIbifiri Kamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03935480773984052778noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-17808931604113909792011-09-04T23:33:29.404-07:002011-09-04T23:33:29.404-07:00I TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU!!!
My parents never gave...I TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU!!!<br /><br />My parents never gave me the sex talk...really wish they did!Blessinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00063729360732047180noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-53752095009479007572011-09-04T02:18:14.913-07:002011-09-04T02:18:14.913-07:00I didn't have much of a sex talk with my paren...I didn't have much of a sex talk with my parents when I was younger...I suppose I learned all things myself !<br />Very nice blog, if you want we could follow each other, I have a mostly fashion related blog but I love reading posts like those you write, hope mine can be interesting for you too ! Kisses<br /><br /><a href="http://fashionandcookies.blogspot.com" rel="nofollow">Fashion and Cookies</a>Vale @ Fashion and Cookieshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05812438891002442128noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-26356892596490611122011-09-03T22:52:18.044-07:002011-09-03T22:52:18.044-07:00@mstizzle loll your mother is so funny... "ar...@mstizzle loll your mother is so funny... "aren't u a virgin".<br />@Okeoghene thank you. I hope your older ones did a good job.Ibifiri Kamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03935480773984052778noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-19122412760027416122011-09-03T21:13:15.761-07:002011-09-03T21:13:15.761-07:00I never had the sex talk, not even the period tal...I never had the sex talk, not even the period talk with my mom. When she realized I had started my period, she just bought me educational books about sex. We never once discussed anything, not with her. I had older ones and when i had questions I asked them.Okeoghenehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06374233345612835685noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-82024726660180221252011-09-03T16:31:39.261-07:002011-09-03T16:31:39.261-07:00Hmm... I had The Talk. It was quite uncomfortable ...Hmm... I had The Talk. It was quite uncomfortable though. It started with me saying I was thinking of switching to tampons and my mum saying ahn ahn aren't you a virgin? Quite uncomfortable.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-1122130221656128182011-09-03T11:55:59.335-07:002011-09-03T11:55:59.335-07:00@sweetly broken thanks. maybe i should including a...@sweetly broken thanks. maybe i should including all the comments.<br />@stelzz so true i will do a little more research on vaginismus.<br />@merra thank you so much and thumbs up for already talking to your daughter about sex.<br />@Ibhade lol @ your 8years old asking what u do always in dad's room in the afternoon and come out later. OMG I can imagine how embarrassed you were.Ibifiri Kamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03935480773984052778noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-80570743620781706782011-09-03T03:23:37.936-07:002011-09-03T03:23:37.936-07:00Nope, my mum never did..learnt it from the biology...Nope, my mum never did..learnt it from the biology class...simply told me no boy should touch me when i started my period which she had been asking me about every month.. 'DID YOU SEE ANY BLOOD STAIN ON YOUR PANT? Before then, i had an idea what sex was all about becox i was already reading romance novels before i saw my period at age 12.<br /><br />Now, as a parent, i must confess, i don't feel so comfortable talking about sex with my daughter, am kind of shy..funny ehn? but i & hubby still do it, trying to explain in a playful.jovial way...like when my 2nd daughter asked me; WHAT DO YOU ALWAYS DO IN DAD'S ROOM IN THE AFTERNOON, AND COME OUT LATER????... *blank stare*......was dumbfounded! how do i explain to my 8year old daughter, i just had a sex with her father? huh?....i ran back to hubby, woke him up, told him to go & reply his daughter o! yes! i didn't know what to say to her!..hahahhaa. Hubby dressed, called all our kids in, sat them on the bed and said, YOUR MOTHER & I DO HAVE PRIVATE 'PLAY', TALK' & SLEEP JUST AS YOU ALL WOULD DO WHEN YOU GET MARRIED IN FUTURE.blah, blah, blah..THAT IS WHY YOU SHOULD NOT DISTURB US, WHEN I LOCK THE DOOR, YOU HEAR? yes sir, they replied, since then, they had come to understand when am in dad's room, NO DISTURBANCE, my sons do ask me every night IF I WOULD SLEEP IN THEIR DAD'S ROOM OR THIER'S??? When i say dad's , they would go ohhhhhhh! Their dad would tell them they should leave his wife alone! That if he does not sleep with me, they won't had been born in mummy's belly!..hahahhaa..the truth my sister, there is really no comfortable & easy way to explain sex to my children ranging form of 3-10years & with the films they are exposed to, they have seen love scenes, which we tell them to look at but must not let any man or woman do that to them until they are married.<br /><br />p.s,,,,tnx for coming over my blog.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-31643684012941866852011-09-03T00:58:34.044-07:002011-09-03T00:58:34.044-07:00This is a very thought provoking post! I am surpri...This is a very thought provoking post! I am surprised that the world over lack of sex education is a problem. I agree with one of the people who have commented that parents think that if they speak about sex they are condoing it... Really foolish. We have spoken to our daugther about it and hopefully, she will get back to us with questions when they come up in her mind. <br />Thanks for stopping by at my blog! Really apprecite it!Meera Sundararajanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15584671517551652378noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-60253211449128877912011-09-02T13:51:32.797-07:002011-09-02T13:51:32.797-07:00Parents are actually making a mistake by not talki...Parents are actually making a mistake by not talking to their kids about it. It's healthier when children(at the right time) understand what they need to about sex and their hormones or bodies. For some people it has actually caused more damage than good ie emotionally, physically, etc. I recently stumbled on an issue called vaginismus whereby females cant have sex because of fear. This is also caused by parents not talking to their kids about it or telling them the wrong things when talking about itstelzzhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09995764681274845055noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-43817501882604372252011-09-02T12:17:32.558-07:002011-09-02T12:17:32.558-07:00WOW! I so love this. It's like you're writ...WOW! I so love this. It's like you're writing for a magazine article or something. You should try to get this published... ;)<br /><br />Well, I really enojoyed reading this post and the comments that followed. It shed some light upon somethings I didn't know about. <br /><br />foreversweetlybroken.blogspot.comOluwaseun S.https://www.blogger.com/profile/06565197839160575238noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-4873662572276367852011-09-02T10:26:23.221-07:002011-09-02T10:26:23.221-07:00@Rhapsody thumbs up to you. Very nice. I will defi...@Rhapsody thumbs up to you. Very nice. I will definitely follow suit. Thank you very much.<br />@Andrea lol i wonder y our parents told us strange stories about sex. One guy told his son that if he had sex before he was 18 he will go blind.. Imagine.Ibifiri Kamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03935480773984052778noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-35313978727608729242011-09-02T10:24:02.014-07:002011-09-02T10:24:02.014-07:00Sex was never discussed by my parents with us but ...Sex was never discussed by my parents with us but I guess during their own days it was never an issue because morality was high. However, in this day and age it will be naive not to do so because sex is everywhere around us. What I advocate is for parents to discuss relationship issues with their children as opposed to just talking about sex in isolation. In doing so, it may help young people understand that sex is one aspect of many other important aspects of a relationship. Nice blog, thanks for stopping by @ www.hilonah-educationthatworksfornigeria.blogspot.com. Please also check my sister blog: www.apenandaheart.blogspot.comNaija4Lifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03535768349773752809noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-54666705563371063692011-09-02T10:06:37.239-07:002011-09-02T10:06:37.239-07:00I was told that if i touch a boy I will get pregna...I was told that if i touch a boy I will get pregnant...Haha.I plan on having the sex talk with my kids.Andreahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15221629896741930249noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-18962633691064916292011-09-02T09:15:24.625-07:002011-09-02T09:15:24.625-07:00Blessings.....
Parents unwillingness to enter int...Blessings.....<br /><br />Parents unwillingness to enter into dialogue with their children about sex is about them, their fears and sometimes discomfort about the subject and awkwardness at having to answer questions that they may not be willing to confront if they were ask...."have you done it?" "What’s it like?" etc. <br /><br />For my mother and her mother before her there were no discussions about sex. That generation and generations before saw many women who were clueless about what was happening to their bodies. Many went into histerics when they got their period almost losing their minds. Some believed that if they kiss it meant they were pregnant and many who were pregnant had no idea even when they went into labor and delivered the baby only to be confronted with a human life for which many were ill equipped to handle.<br /><br />Often Parents think that if they speak to their children about sex it means that they are condoning it and giving permission to engage in sexual activity. This naive perception lulls them into a false sense of security of “don’t tell means they won’t do,” although the reality is children, youths, young adults are having sex and experimenting in all forms of sexual activities anyway. I guess one of the main issue is that they (parents) often think of the graphic parts of the sexual activity and feel they may have to become explicit in their explanations so they shrink away in embarrassment and shame. The feeling is multiplied especially if the child is young and comes with questions that take the parents by surprise. The thing is one can speak about sex without getting ponographic but many parents don’t know how. Throw religion into the mix and all hell literally breaks loose. <br /><br />As a mother I spoke with my daughters about sex, everything and anything there was to be told i told them. Each discussion was appropriate to their age or specific to their questions. My strategy was to arm my daughters with the truth and the facts to counteract the bullshit and many misinformations out there about sex and sexuality. The correct information helps them to maneuver the myriad of myths and misconceptions about sex, sexuality and their bodies. It assists them in understanding their boundaries and what is acceptable and not acceptable for them. My girls were aware; I even had the talk about the array of STDs out there and followed them up with graphic photos of the consequences of contracting an STD and what one might be facing should this consequence be visited upon them. As my girls got older and they had questions I answered them even when it seated me uncomfortably because I had to think of their safety and welfare. After some years if I brought up the subject they would yell…..MOM! MOM! MOM! TMI (too much information) and they would start singing or talking loudly over me to block me out, hehe, I got a kick out of that and would laugh uproariously. At that point I knew my job was done, that what they needed they would ask, think and at the very least try to find out.Rhapsody Phoenixhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03520384490148575528noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-72419916948583417252011-09-02T08:52:21.866-07:002011-09-02T08:52:21.866-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Rhapsody Phoenixhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03520384490148575528noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-4015728596238679032011-09-02T05:08:54.869-07:002011-09-02T05:08:54.869-07:00@Mbabazi God will help u and i know u will do the ...@Mbabazi God will help u and i know u will do the right thing.<br />@Meredith loll that was what your mum told you. so funny. yep she didn't give the facts. Thanks for trusting me to be the voice. I will try. <br />Thank you guys for commenting.Ibifiri Kamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03935480773984052778noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-76514266806094237402011-09-01T14:25:09.321-07:002011-09-01T14:25:09.321-07:00I am proud of you for speaking out about this topi...I am proud of you for speaking out about this topic and you are right...it shouldn't be so taboo. It's up to people like you to change the way the world views these issues. The truth is that nothing will change if someone doesn't speak and this is true with so many subjects where for whatever the reasons (religious, cultural, age etc) people have been silenced. Yes, my mom told me basically, "Don't get naked with a boy, because he will go tell all his friends and then you will have a bad reputation." I don't think that was very good information and certainly didn't lay out any "facts" that I needed to know. I know I will be open with my daughters and hope that they will confide in me and feel comfortable that I will not shame them for their inquiries.Compassion Fashion https://www.blogger.com/profile/09170555375475672876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-5122078802781772262011-09-01T13:33:56.094-07:002011-09-01T13:33:56.094-07:00didnt have the official talk but my mum kept throw...didnt have the official talk but my mum kept throwing around threatening statements like that. I will be sure to do so with my Kids. So help me GodMbabazihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10882937883154254109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-5300510615851065402011-09-01T06:14:11.770-07:002011-09-01T06:14:11.770-07:00@Anna Fani thats fantastic i also read that too. I...@Anna Fani thats fantastic i also read that too. In fact my knowledge about sex was attributed to the fact that i started reading very early.<br />@N.I.L. I love the way to talk to your son. Its so true that there are girls who are quit happy to become pregnant cos they don't have dreams at all.Ibifiri Kamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03935480773984052778noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-49602130400785575512011-09-01T05:13:41.575-07:002011-09-01T05:13:41.575-07:00I never had the sex talk with my parents
However, ...I never had the sex talk with my parents<br />However, I am talk openly about sex with my 11 year old.<br />I have discussed the biological process; why and how emotions are involved and why one's body is sacred.<br />I have also told them that sex is not a 'fun experiment' because (a) people get diseases that can affect them for life and (b) some girls are quite happy to get pregnant because they dont have any dreams!N.I.L (Naijamum in London)https://www.blogger.com/profile/15874463908664570341noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1422560827241634974.post-63154825618609949172011-09-01T03:17:28.302-07:002011-09-01T03:17:28.302-07:00By the way, if I have children, I intend to be ope...By the way, if I have children, I intend to be open with them about sex, love, making choices and the consequences of wrong choices.Anna Fanihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03483959757047377139noreply@blogger.com